I still can’t deal with it. I’m seriously still in the denial stage. I’m avoiding it. Not watching the news. Couldn’t even THINK of watching his acceptance speech or even her concession speech. What I want to hear is her ACCEPTANCE speech. I would LOVE to hear that right now. I know it wouldn’t change the outcome, but hearing about the momentous success of how far this country has come and how it will continue on a positive, progressive path. I need to hear HER. I need to hear about the accomplishments past and future. The thanks to a pioneering president who has brought us so far in social justice issues these past eight years. (Remember he was elected the same night Prop 8 was voted in to stop marriage equality in California.) You know Lily Ledbetter, health care for millions and marriage equality are in that speech. I need that reassurance. That hope for the future. Because that’s not the path I see ahead. I see women, people of color, LGBT youth facing the overt oppression that has been somewhat veiled in the past. I see what has already happened in the past two days continuing unabated because it’s been sanctioned by their leader.
I finally started reaching out tonight. Frank and I shared the wrenching experience Election Night (so glad he didn’t have rehearsal), but I really only talked to one friend at work yesterday. I was avoiding it. Still in denial. Tonight after work I talked to my neighbor about it. It helped to talk it a out a bit more. We talked about how fortunately isolated we are in California. But it’s the young woman in Oklahoma, the gay kid in Michigan, the Muslim family in Kentucky. Those are the ones I’m worried about. She’s ready to march in the streets. And I will be there some day. But not right now. I can’t even get behind Michael Moore right now. In denial. I was texting with some (more politically-inclined) friends in Michigan. I had to reach out. I remember calling (was that even a thing?) my best friend in 2000 when it looked like Al Gore was going to pull it out. How exciting, yet, tenuous it was. Then….
I just want to shut it out. Denial.